When God Says "NO"

I've been given some options lately that I haven't known what to do with.  These are potential opportunities that would be incredible--and could move me into the place where God wants me.  It's exciting to even THINK about the options in front of me... And TERRIFYING, as well!

The scary part for me isn't so much the idea of change--I LOVE change, and would thrive on constant change, if possible.  The scary part of me is that we live our life of faith by just that--FAITH.  It means that the decisions I make in my life are not guaranteed.  I do the best I can with the understanding that I have and then leave the rest up to God.

And for a reformed control freak - that's HARD.

So God gave me a challenge.  And if God gives you a challenge, you'd better do it.

My challenge was to document the major decisions in my adult life, and to examine how I came to make the decisions I made.

The list began:
Going to North Central
Quitting my job
Haiti
Facilitating Freedom Session for a second year

On and on I wrote about how God communicated with me.  And two things became clear:
1) For all of these decisions, I KNEW.  Something deep in my gut told me what the right decision was, and I knew that I had to follow it--no matter what other people said or did.  Some of them happened instantaneously (like Haiti--I knew the night I was asked to go, even though I didn't admit it for a few days).  Others took years (like quitting my job--I'd wanted to for a long time, but it wasn't until last fall that I was released to do so).  But no matter how long it took to get to the point of knowing, I knew.  And the end result is that my life was changed--AND the lives of the people I interact with.

2) Knowing the answer often meant knowing what NOT to do more than what TO do.  The disobedience in Freedom Session again.  I didn't have a clear answer for awhile.  Then Ken, the founder of Freedom Session, came to our church to preach--and I realized what life would be if I did NOT facilitate... and recognized that as disobedience.
each of these decisions was sometimes easier to see than the obedience.  Last year I asked God if I should be facilitating

So what does that mean for me right now?
I get to pray some more.  A LOT more.  And it's encouraging.  Because it means that if I'm open to hear when God is saying "YES" or "NO," I will hear.  I don't have to push for a decision.  I don't have to force it.  God will clearly say, "Yes, do this," in His way.

It just may sound (to me) a lot like, "NO-you can't do that anymore."

Speaking

OK, Check it out!
Speakers from the She Leads Conference in March 2013.  I'm at 2:40:00 if you want to watch.  The rest of the speakers are phenomenal!!

Just Say No!

I love praying with other people.  It's an incredible time to talk to our Savior and express our needs while hearing His heart.  However... I've been noticing something.  And it's REALLY bugging me.

When we talk to Jesus, we say the word "just" a lot.  Seriously... a LOT.

It's annoying.  And it's made me wonder... how often do I say "just" when I'm talking to friends or family, or even while I'm voicing in English as a sign language interpreter?  I've paid attention today, folks...
I don't say it.

So why am I so free to use the word "just" when talking with the Lord??

I went to www.dictionary.com to see what the definition of "just" is.  Here are two that fit my (OUR!) use of the word:

• Only or merely: He was just a clerk until he became ambitious.
• Actually; really; positively: The weather is just glorious.

I'm fairly certain that we'd like to say we're using the word "just" as the second definition:  "I'm positively asking for Your presence!"  or "We actually are coming to You today..."

The problem, however, is that we're not.  We're using just as "only" or "merely" - minimizing both our request and the God who can answer that request.

If I say, "I just need your help" I'm saying that 1) my request for help is minimal (which it probably is in the larger picture of life!), but I think I'm also saying that 2) I only need the minimal amount of assistance from a minimal God. 

That's not what I want to say!

Are my problems small in God's plan of salvation, healing, help, and glory?  Yeah.  I'm pretty insignificant when compared with the God of the universe.  But to Him...  If I minimize who HE is in my problem, then His resulting GLORY is minimized!

My goal, in the midst of my problems, joys, and requests, should be to lead people to Jesus, to share His story, or even just to show how much He cares about the emotions and circumstances of my life. 

The next time I feel tempted to say "just" in my prayers to the Lord, I want to remember this.  I want to word things so that God gets ALL the glory, not just the measley amount that I would like to credit Him with.

Will you take this "Just Say No!" pledge with me?!

When the Church is Full

Our packed Saturday night service!

Church on Easter is a remarkable thing.  Not only do churches try to ensure that everything from the number of greeters to the special music is spot on, the church, in general, expects record numbers of attendance.

People who say they "go" to church, but only attend a few times a year pop out of the woodwork.  Folks who think, "Hm... maybe I should see what this is about," or "I should do a 'good' thing on Easter" show up.  Friends of regular attenders come, dressed in their Easter best.  Rooms are crammed, kids' teachers have their hands full, and seats can be hard to find.

Those of us who go to church on the dreary weekends in February and stunningly beautiful weekends in August know that the building is packed far more than usual.  Those who don't regularly come assume that they're not the only ones making the trek to the packed house of God.

The thing is...  If the Church (meaning the people in the church, not the building itself) is telling God's story...  I'm thrilled that those who don't normally step foot in the building decided to for one day.  You know why?

God is up to something.

God is always up to something.  He has a story to tell... about real lives transformed and a HOPE that so many people have lost, forgotten, or never known.

And as a Church (again, the people, not the building) it is our responsibility to share that hope, that story.  If it means smiling at people, shaking their hands, and turning on the air conditioning (all things I got to do this weekend!), or if it means standing on the platform showing how a REAL person has found grace, hope, and redemption, we've all done our part to tell His story.

If you went to church this weekend, I hope you heard part of that story.  If you didn't go this weekend, He still wants to share it with you.

It's pretty incredible.  And I guarantee, whether you were there or not...

God is still up to something!

In Honor of International Women's Day

My friend Vicki announced on Facebook tonight that tomorrow (Friday) is International Women's Day.  Her challenge?  To write a tribute to women who have inspired, pushed, or encouraged you.

Vicki?  Game on.

First of all I want to comment on the day itself.  Sometimes, I think we forget how amazing women are.  Women have, historically, been treated as less than.  Unequal.  But oh, how women are so much more.  From the very beginning, Eve was not created as a secondary citizen, but an equal partner, sharing in God's love.  Women throughout history have been rejected, abandoned, abused, trafficked... and yet they rise above.  In freedom they tell their story--a story of grace and redemption.  Of love.  Of LIFE.

My tribute today will not encompass everyone.  I wish I had pages I could write on each of you, but my time (and yours) is limited.  Today, I can only select two groups of women.

The first women I must thank today are my Mothers...  My mom, step-mom, and grandmothers.  The ones who knew me from the beginning (well, or since second grade!).  Strong women.  Capable women.  Women who allowed me to be me and celebrated who I was and who I have become.  My grandmothers proved that there is nothing more comforting than grandma's arms.  My mothers proved their strength and mettle as single moms--fighting for what was right for their children.  These women will never know the depth of my gratitude and admiration for them.  Mom and G - here's to many, many more years.

The second women are the female pastors in my life.  I didn't realize how unusual it was for me to have the kind of impact you all have had on my life.  Women I've churched under--like JoAnn, Hedy, Dawn, Anna.  The ministry "greats" in my life--showing how much God loves His daughters to serve as much as His sons.  Women I've churched with, or even from afar--like Korista, Chantel, Vicki, Angela... and every single SHWAG and U40 sister.  God is using you, my friends.  Thank you for your service to Him.

There is my heart tonight.  Who are the women YOU tribute this week?

What Opportunities Look Like

Many of you know that I quit my job in November/December in the hopes that God would move me into ministry.  I had a hope of a part-time job that would pay the bills until something opened up--either part-time (to pair with the other job) or full-time.  Secretly, however, I wanted everything to work out perfectly...  You know: announce my resignation one day, be offered the most perfect ministry job the next?

I should know better by now.

God doesn't work that way in my life.  I have heard of story after story of how He's done that for others, but not for me.  For me, for whatever reason, it's about the waiting.  The waiting, which is... really frustrating.  But also... it's reassuring, if I take a really big step back.  (OK, a REALLY big step back!)  God is always up to something in my life, but He always takes His time doing it.  It's part of how I know it's Him working.

So I'm not working in paid ministry.  Opportunities to serve, however, have exploded. 
Seriously.

I have even met with those who have walked this path before, and gleaned so much from their experience.  One of the main lessons I'm learning?

"Whatever you're doing, it's experience.  Use it.  Learn from it.  Grow from it.  

It'll add one more tool to your toolbox."

This is probably some of the best advice I've gotten so far. 

•  That job that isn't ministry, but pays the bills?  Learn from it:  Develop trust before you share your message.
• Teaching those kids?  If you can communicate the truth of God to children, you can communicate it to adults.
• Managing greeters?  Hone your administrative and encouragement sides.  Keep your eyes open and pay attention to the people around you.  Lead a ministry.
• Speaking in church?  Study.  Pray.  Practice.  Figure out which hand YOU need to hold the microphone in.  Be YOU.

There is so much more I'm involved in, and I'm looking around every corner now for the tidbits that I'm learning, the parts that I can glean from each person and experience. 

Colossians 4:5 says to "make the most out of every opportunity."  Challenge accepted!

The Word of the Year for 2013

A few weeks ago, I was inspired by a Compassion International blog post on finding a word of the year.  Something that God wants to use in your life to remind you of who He is, who you are, or what He's up to.

I immediately had a word pop in my head, but thought, "That's FAR too negative of a word.  There's no way that it can be mine for a year."

However, the word kept repeating in my life--it and its opposite...  I would read it in the Bible, hear it in conversation, even speak it's opposite from the platform at church.  Each time, my spirit would leap a little... Whispering, "Yes... YES!  I believe!"

This week I've begun to embrace my word:

It sounds negative, doesn't it?!  Nothing.  When I first started thinking about it, all I could think of was The Nothing from The Neverending Story.  "God?" I asked.  "God, would You give me a word that hopeless?"

Ah, what little understanding I had!


A reminder that it is GOD who we dwell in and who dwells in us. 
 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." ~John 15:5

While the word "nothing" is not written here, it's implied in the list of items.  NOTHING can separate us from the love of God!
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord" ~Romans 8:38-39

In Mark 8, when the people listening to Jesus teaching had been there for days with no food, Jesus recognized that they had nothing...  and did a miracle by providing food.  Jesus is STILL in the business of miracles today!

It's opposite, "anything" or "everything" has been impacting me as well.
In Mark 9:23, Jesus says, "Everything is possible for one who believes."

This year, God apparently means to teach me that He is much more powerful and unlimited than I have ever given Him credit for.  And I am unbelievably excited to learn that lesson.